Sam, Julia, Me, Elana and Arielle on our way to birthday dinner (photo via Elana)
Hi everyone- I'm writing to you from Julia's room in San Diego. My nose is stuffy, I have a sort of painful canker sore in the inside of my cheek, and my hair looks disgusting, but hey- at least I had a CRAZY Vegas weekend chock full of stories to share with you. I could give you a play-by-play of every detail (and trust me, I do love to talk), but I think I'll just divide my posts into categories. That way, you (and I both) won't get bored halfway.
So...this first post will focus on a topic I know you all love to hear about: my encounters with the opposite sex:
The hottie on the plane: One of the downsides of being tiny and traveling sans-checked baggage: it's nearly impossible to put your rolling bag into the overhead bin without help. Though I was thankful to the middle aged man standing behind me in the aisle of the plane for initially hoisting my little Betsy Johnson suitcase into the bin above my seat, he was less than memorable. The guy that helped me get it down, on the other hand, was super cute. I'd been hoping he'd strike up a conversation with me for the entire flight, but sadly, he didn't. So, when it was time to deplane, I seized my opportunity:
"Hey, can you help me get my suitcase down so I don't kill anyone?"
He smiled kindly and obliged.
"We wouldn't want that to happen!"
Yeah, that's me- I'm a charmer.
The drunk party-goers: After celebrating Jules' first (legal) drink in style at the Belagio, we headed back to our hotel to change shoes and engage in a bit of gambling. (For the record, I gambled a wopping $3. Though Jules came home with around $600, I was too chicken to actually try out the tables. Plus, I've come to realize that the Vegas lifestyle really isn't me- but that's for another post.) It was particularly fun talking to some drunk guys who couldn't wait to wish Julia a happy 21st. For some reason, in my tipsy state, I thought it was a good idea to switch to Hebrew. The guys had no idea what we were saying, but Sam, Jules and I thought it was hysterical.
The homeless guy: When he saw Jule's sparkly birthday crown, this grungy, disgusting guy felt the need to shout:
When Jules didn't respond, he let out a gravely "aww come on." We ran away as fast as we could.
The Israeli Kiosk guy: Arielle thought he was cute, so we pretended to be interested in the steamer he was trying to sell. We all knew he was Israeli, but played dumb and asked him where he was from. When he said "Israel," we explained that the five of us had originally met in Israel, where we'd lived together for 9 months. We told him it was Julia's 21st, and he responded by saying we didn't look 21...especially me. He definitely knew how to win me over...NOT.
The coworkers from Maine: On Saturday night, after a fabulous Italian birthday dinner, we hit the club at New York, New York. Though we were sad to know that free Skyy Vodka drinks had ended just a few minutes earlier, we still hit the dance floor...with gusto! There, I convinced Jules that she needed to climb up on stage. Of course, I jumped up first and had to DRAG her up behind me, but she eventually complied. Oh, and as Elana tried to take photos from the dance floor, a 40-50 year old guy offered to take photos from a better angle. It was slightly awkward, but I will say, I was enthralled by the younger, much more attractive guy standing next to him. Eventually, the "old" guy asked me where I was from, I think mainly as an opener for his cute coworker to step in. Cute coworker then offered to buy a round of drinks "for my girls" and I happily obliged, especially because "get a guy to buy us a round of drinks" was on our Vegas to-do list!
After bringing me my drink, I felt obligated to chat with the guy and found out that he not only went to school in Boston, he was also in Vegas on business, working at a trade show. Yup...this guy's life mirrored my own. I was happy to chat with him, because we had so much in common. I felt bad when our group decided to change locations, and apologized for leaving. It would have been fun to keep talking with him, but whatever :)
The gay strippers: I don't want to go into details, because I was thoroughly disgusted, but I'm ashamed to say I was dragged to a strip club. It was eye opening to say the least, and though the rest of my group seemed ok with the situation, I was not. Watching hairless men prance around in g-strings? NOT my idea of fun. I spent about an hour moping in the corner. It was absolute torture. Note to my best gal pals: when planning my bachelorette party, please, please, PLEASE don't hire a stripper! You will make me cry.
The creepy Flatbush guy: On Sunday night, we'd hoped to get into "Tryst," a super-classy club at the Whynn hotel, with the free passes Julia had received. Unfortunately, Tryst was closed Sunday nights, so we were forced to try out XS, another club in the hotel. The price was steep, but we were all dressed up and in the mood to go out. At XS, we were unhappy to find that the club, however swanky and grown up, was overpriced and underwhelming. The funniest and most disturbing part of the evening was when two young-ish guys came up to our group and started chatting with us. One guy (Ike) grabbed me by my arm, spun me around and told me I was adorable. I could tell he was drunk because he kept kissing my cheek. It was sort of gross. He then pulled me aside (although still within my friends' watchful gaze) and asked me if I was really a "good Jewish girl." Baffled and slightly creeped out, I said yes. He then proceeded to tell me he was " a nice Jewish boy," and when I questioned his religion, he offed to show me he was Jewish. It was disgusting. I ran over to my friends, who proceeded to share a disturbing truth: Ike was married and had a newborn baby at home. Eww. Eww. EWW.
Needless to say, I think you understand my feelings on the men of Las Vegas. Sure, maybe they're decent guys when they're in their natural habitats, but Vegas seems to creepify people. Thanks, but no thanks- I think I'll stick with some nice Boston boys...though to be honest with you, I'm not sure about them either. No worries, I'm still young.